Wednesday, September 16, 2009

You Scratch My Back, I’ll Scratch Yours


 

Forrest Gump's mom, Sally Field (aka Frog Legs in Smokey and the Bandit and also Norma Jean) is credited with teaching Tom Hanks (formerly Kip Wilson in Bosom Buddies) that "Life is like a box of chocolates." The best one that I'm going to claim credit for making up goes like this:


 

A good relationship is like giving and receiving a good back scratch. Let's say that the husband is trying to give the wife a good back scratch. She just sits there wishing that "I wish he'd go a bit lower" or "scratch a bit harder," but she keeps her mouth shut, just being thankful that he's paying any attention to her at all. In order for her to enjoy it, she's got to give him directions. "A little lower. Down to the right. AH YESSSS!!!!"


 

On the other hand, he has to listen. He can't say, "Shut up, I've scratched a hundred backs before. I know what I'm doing."


 

Giving and receiving a good back scratch requires open ears, open hands, open communication and open hearts. Good fingernails or one of those plastic back-scratching hands you get at the county fair can help, too. You have to focus on the goal – to give the gift of complete, undivided attention, to help your cherished one feel good.


 

So many times, couples get into trouble when they stop giving their partner directions, and stop listening. If you really want to "hit the spot," ask questions. Receive directions. Adjust where you scratch, how hard, and when. Give your poor partner directions. Don't expect him to read your back (mind). Lack of the ability to read minds does not automatically equal insensitivity. Be brave – give directions. Let her know what feels good. Listen to what he's telling you.

Too often, when couples keep their mouths and ears shut, each person is doing a lot of scratching, but it isn't hitting the spot. This leads to resentment, feelings of futility, irritability, and sometimes anger.

Examples of this are endless. Take a couple married for 10 years with 2 pre-school children. She stays at home a couple days a week and works a couple days a week. He puts in the "normal" 50 hours and does what he can around the house. She takes care of all of the shopping, 90% of the cooking, and about 70% of the child-rearing, although he does a lot when he's home. He runs the family business, pays the bills, takes care of the vehicles, and does the yard. Neither of them do that much house-work, except for keeping stuff that causes diseases cleaned up.

He secretly wishes that she'd greet him at the door with a long, passionate kiss instead of the usual peck on the cheek and the retreat into her reading room now that she's not in charge of the kids anymore. She wishes he'd just clean up after himself. After all, she cleans up after 3 people all <insert expletive> day long, two of whom can turn a room upside down in less than 4.2 seconds.

Each morning, he's up first and the boy usually is up not long after he does. The boy wants attention, so Dad grabs him and they eat cereal together, even though the boy would much rather go up and see what Mommy is doing. Dad wants Mommy to have that extra 20 minutes of sleep he knows she deserves since she works so hard. He is scratching away.

She cooks this 3-course dinner and has it warm and ready when he walks in the back door. This beats the hell out of the microwaved frozen dinner that passes for culinary fare at least 3 nights each week. She's scratching.

Unfortunately, they miss each other, not from lack of effort, but lack of communicating. Each of them wants the other to know that they care how they feel and wants to help them feel better. Yet, making assumptions and not giving directions leaves them both feeling frustrated, angry, tired, hopeless, and too often – alone.

Although you're certainly not in charge of your partner's feelings, you can sure affect them. Unless you're a total Neanderthal (no offense intended to those of the Neanderthalic persuasion), you want to give each other good feelings. Talk and listen and you stand a much better chance of hitting the spot.

Ooooh, that feels really good.

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Health Care does NOT equal Health Insurance

In the public discussion about the necessity of fixing the extremely broken health care system in the United States, the terms "health care" and "health insurance" or "health coverage" are essentially used interchangeably. If the discussion is to progress constructively, it is imperative that consumers, policy-makers, and health-care providers use these terms accurately. Health care is what is provided in the doctor's office. Health coverage
is all about who pays for it. I'll explain why this distinction is important.

First, insurance companies like this confusion because it makes them look viable. The following quote is from the Iowa Health Insurance Network website (www.iowahealthnetwork.com) : "Wellmark provides (emphasis mine) all health care services through their highly acclaimed PPO network known as Alliance Select and the managed indemnity plan through their Classic Blue network."Now while this is technically accurate, the wording is misleading. Wellmark does not directly provide any health care whatsoever. The doctors in its networks are contracted with, but not employed by Wellmark. If Wellmark actually provides health care services, it is practicing medicine without a license.

In my experience, health insurance companies provide very little service at all. They make money in 3 ways – by collecting premiums, denying payment, and investments. Premiums are skyrocketing. According to Linda A. Johnson (her article)with the Associated Press, "Health insurance premiums have skyrocketed, making it ever-tougher for workers and employers to afford them. From 1999 through 2008, annual health insurance premiums jumped 119 percent, according to Kaiser data. The average family premium paid by workers rose from $1,543 to $3,354 a year, and employer payments per worker jumped from $4,247 to $9,325." However, for them to be profitable (and their profits can be obscene), they must figure out ways to keep more and more of the premiums and pay out less and less to the doctors who actually treat patients. Indeed, as a new report by Health Care for America NOW points out, "profits at 10 of the country's largest publicly-traded health insurance companies in 2007, rose 428 percent from 2000 to 2007, from $2.4 billion to $12.9 billion." In 2007, the chief executive officers at these companies collected combined total compensation of $118.6 million — an average of $11.9 million each." The average salary for your family physician is about $173,000/year.

The 2nd way they make money is by denying payment. In a study conducted in 1999 by Price Waterhouse Cooper that determined if health insurance companies denied only 1% of all claims, even if they later paid those claims within the maximum allowable time (usually about a year), the industry would make $280 million in interest during that period of time. By denying this payment, and even eventually making it, they generate interest income while the doctors whose payment is denied either lose interest, or worse yet, have to borrow money to cover the shortfalls created by this procedure. I can't tell you how many times we have submitted clean claim forms, have them denied, and then re-submit the exact same form and have it paid for.

Insurance companies do not value their doctors. I recently received a letter from the largest health insurance company in the US greeting me as "Dear Provider," with no recognition that I am a licensed doctoral-level psychologist. Other letters refer to me as Paul M. Conditt, LP, presumably standing for Licensed Psychologist – or perhaps Liquid Propane or a classic vinyl record. My correct title is Psy.D. (Doctor of Psychology). Reimbursement rates for doctoral level psychologists are only slightly higher than that for master's level therapists, even though we have usually 2-3 times as much training. In the medical field, increasingly more treatment is being provided by Physician's Assistants or Advanced Registered Nurse Practitioners to save costs, even though their training is a fraction of that obtained by an MD. A couple of weeks ago, I got a call from an insurance company asking if I needed help with a child diagnosed with Asperger's Disorder. I was highly offended. They offered to have me consult with a master's level therapist who may or may not have any training with the disorder (I have a lot), who has never seen the child, and did not take into account that I have successfully worked with this child off and on for over 4 years. I assured the representative that when I need consultation, I seek it from highly qualified professionals who have excelled in the area of treatment I could use some guidance in.

Insurance company policies greatly drive up my over-head costs. Billing can be a complete nightmare. We get multiple denials each month where there is absolutely nothing wrong with the claim form. We resubmit it and it gets paid. What a waste of time, paper, and postage. A couple of years ago, a big switch was made nationwide to make claim forms more universal. The company that covers about 70% of our clientele had some problems with its system in receiving the claims. We kept getting denial after denial. After many hours of intense discussion the phone with a myriad of different "representatives," I finally decided to lodge a complaint with the State Insurance Commission. They did nothing, explaining that "we assume that insurance companies are telling the truth unless there is evidence to the contrary." They didn't bother to try to gather any other evidence and ignored the evidence I sent them that outlined how the insurance company made multiple mistakes and lied to me about how to "fix" the claim forms. The company ended up owing us over $15,000, which we eventually collected, but this is a huge percentage of our gross annual revenue. Having to go without that cash flow for 3 months nearly put us out of business.

A huge talking point by the more conservative politicians is that a public insurance option will limit competition. What they don't recognize is that there is, in practice, almost no competition. In Iowa, Wellmark Blue Cross Blue Shield insures about 70% of the population. No doctor or clinic can afford not to be on their provider panels for two reasons. Business-wise, since so few people pay out of pocket for psychological care, we would be cutting 70% of our customer base. Secondly, because most doctors are in business to help people, we don't want to discriminate against people who have a certain insurance plan that they cannot afford not to utilize. The "competition" they speak of is not about competing over who will provide the highest-quality, best bargain health care, but who will pay for it.

Another option is to essentially expand Medicare and Medicaid to cover anyone who wants it. As a psychologist, my experience with these programs has largely been negative. First of all, our small business could not keep the doors open if the majority of our clients were covered under these plans at current reimbursement rates. We accept Medicaid in our practice because of our commitment to provide for the lower income population. However, this requires us to give a 40% discount below our standard fee. Secondly, the rules for participating in these programs can be prohibitive. Years ago, Medicare changed the rules about documentation, saying that start and stop times must be recorded for each session. Prior to that, the total length of the session was reported. They did not inform providers of this rule change. When large organizations were audited, any records that did not have start and stop times recorded were considered to be fraudulent charges. Therefore, the agency had to not only pay back what was paid for those sessions, but also a stiff penalty. Also, any clinic that accepts Medicare has to have all records comply with Medicare standards. When auditing, the Medicare officials are allowed to examine all charts, not just those covered by Medicare.

The last time I was audited by the large HMO contracted by the state to run the state Medicaid contract, I was docked points for not having documented the allergies a client has in the chart. I argued with the auditor, saying that doing so essentially forces me to practice outside my area of competence. I am a clinical psychologist, not a medical doctor or an allergist. By me documenting this, I am implying that I know at least something about allergies. All I know is what happens in my own sinus system at certain times of the year. Many dentists will not accept the state Medicaid in Iowa at all because of low reimbursement rates and the fact that this clientele tends to have poorer outcomes and higher no-show rates.

Health insurance companies have no positive influence over the quality of health care, and if anything, are decreasing the quality. It is similar to teachers teaching to the test. Doctors are getting more pressure to treat based upon what will get reimbursed, having to balance that with what is in the best interests of the patient. Lesser-trained providers are cheaper, so insurance companies give preference to policies that utilize them over doctors.

In summary, health care does NOT equal health insurance. In the upcoming decision-making process, policies must be developed that help rein in costs. Insurance companies will try to focus the discussion on ways that doctors, hospitals in clinics "waste" money, implying that they (the insurance companies) are the models of efficiency. This is far from true, and if they want to be a player in the reform, they must reform themselves first. Doctors must learn to be more transparent about what the benefits and costs are of different treatment options, communicate them to their patients, and then be given the freedom to make decisions based on what is best for the patient, not for the insurance company.

Tuesday, February 3, 2009

Re-valuing value

Here in the culture of the pursuit of happiness, we have lost our ability to value. Not that we have necessarily lost our values, but we have lost the ability to assign value. We can put dollar amounts on some things, but even that does not impart value, in and of itself. In these dire economic times, we need to learn HOW to value.
Current examples of not knowing how to value things are abundantly obvious. Part of the problem with the “credit crunch” is that there is now all this property available that is not worth what is owed on it. How much is a house worth? The simple answer is – whatever someone is willing to pay for it. You may own a beautiful zillion dollar beach property, but if you need to sell it and no one is willing to buy it, it is worth zero dollars.
We have Wall Street executives receiving multi-million dollar “performance bonuses.” First of all, if these bonuses are truly tied to performance, and the performance is pitiful, why are they still getting bonuses?
While a common explanation (or more accurately, blame) is that greed is at fault, I believe that our inability to value goods and services is also a factor.
There’s a book I recommend, called Your Money or Your Life, by Vicki Robin. She and Joe Dominguez developed a program that has a very interesting formula to help determine value. In this formula, you take your wage and determine your “real” wage. Divide what you make by the hours that you work. Then subtract out commuting time and other variables that detract from your earnings. For example, if your commute is an hour each way, then your 8-hour day turns into a 10-hour day. You also subtract the gas money, wear and tear on your car, etc. Once you figure out how much you actually make, then you equate that to your life energy. To make the math easy, let’s say your real wage is $10/hour. For every $10 you make, you have traded an hour of your life energy for that $10. For every $10 you spend, you have traded an hour’s worth of life for whatever it is you purchased.
When explaining this to clients, I draw the difference between spending $5 at a fast food joint versus $10 at a nice sit-down restaurant. For me personally, the half hour I trade for a fast-food meal is not worth it. However, if I truly enjoy the meal and the restaurant, the hour I trade may be worth it. If your house (or rent) payment is $1000/month, then you trade 100 hours of life energy for your dwelling.
Contemplate this. What if we only spent our life-energy on things that give and support life? Spending $12 on a picnic lunch at the park with your kids may give a much greater return on your investment than $12 spent at the nearest fast-food joint. Renting movies that provide true entertainment rather than just an escape from the grind of life and give energy back. Reading books that engage your brain gives life.
Think about not only what you value, but how you value things and experiences. Invest in things that give you life.

Monday, January 5, 2009

Getting Started

Howdy Y'all,

This is my very first blog entry. To begin, please do not confuse me with Dr. Phil. We have the same first name (Dr.) but that's where the similarities end. In this blog, we'll be discussing all sorts of things psychological, emotional, cognitive, relational, spiritual, and even current events. Email me with questions you've always wanted to ask a psychologist, but were afraid to ask.